Your Mom Goes to College

I have been to college twice now, at two different colleges in two different states. I have a BA in sociology and I'm working on my second--A Master's in Music Education. My voice teacher told me the other day I should be a college counselor after overhearing me give my young friend advice...now, I share all that I've learned with you for free! 1) Decide your sophomore or junior year in high school if you really want to go to college. Your parents might kill me for telling you this, but college is not for everyone. Some people aren't that academic, or just don't know yet what they want to do. It seriously is better to take a few years off than to just "pick something," and let me tell you, the pressure to do this once you're in college only worsens. Take it from me: As a young idealist, I forced myself into sociology, and ended up being an underpaid social worker with a mountain of debt and no health care. Not only that, but I spent the $7,000 I had earned in scholarships for one year at a private liberal arts school that I didn't even end up staying at. If I had taken a few years off to clear my head, I probably would have chosen a cheaper college close to home and gone into education much earlier. Keep in mind that if you never go to college, you will most likely have to work two lower-paying jobs to make ends meet. Some people do this their whole life and are okay with it, so it's a choice you have to make. 2) If you are sure you want to go to college, decide what is important to you. Once again, I suppose I should expect angry comments from parents, but the truth is, college isn't all about schoolwork. Just like high school, there is a whole social and emotional aspect you have to consider. I moved away from home to Chicago at eighteen, and ended up having nightmares, calling my mom crying, and fighting with my roommates, only to move back home a year later broke and defeated. Decide what you want to gain from college while keeping in mind you are there to learn, too. Is work study important to you? Class size? Are you an athlete? Are you of a certain culture or orientation where sensitivity is key? Do you want to party? Do you want peace and quiet? Are you going to have to work? Do you want to live at home or far away? On campus or apartment? Is religion important to you? What about diversity? Visit as many schools as you can, even before you apply. Imagine yourself living there for four years, and try not to pay attention to the dazzlies they will inevitably wave in front of your nose (waffles every Tuesday, jacuzzis in the dorms, home of Dave Matthews, whatever). Try going to the various offices and see how helpful/organized the staff is; not just the tour guides who get paid to be helpful and perky. 3) Next, decide where to go and apply to schools. I suggest making a list of "must haves" and "can't handles" for your college experience, then going online to look at schools you have heard about and sound interesting. I would look at about 20 schools, all in geographic areas you can definitely picture yourself living in for four years or more. Beach bunnies might think snow is awesome for a week or so, but once the cracked hands and staticky hair kick in, they might be crying for the summer sun. Then, narrow down the list of 20 to about 10 schools that have most of your "must have" items and the fewest of your "can't handles". Don't forget to include price as a factor, as financial aid only goes so far. Then go through each school and assign a positive number +1 through+6 for each "must have" the school has, and a negative number -1 to -6 for each "can't handle" it has. For example, Ohio State: Must have: great football team, +5. Can't handle: winter weather, -4. Total score for Ohio State=+1. From the list of ten, choose three that most closely match your requirements numerically only! (aka, high positive numbers match the closest!) This is very important! If you don't pay attention to the numbers, bias will creep in; aka, you may make your decision based on the picture of the grounds, how nice the lady on the phone was, etc. Then, visit these three schools. The above process should be done your junior year, that way you're not pressured to choose a school right away. Reevaluate the schools after visiting, using the above number system. If you don't think these schools are the right fit, visit more schools until you arrive at three you want to apply to. Send for applications to these schools, or, most schools have electronic applications to complete right on the web. Next, you may want to have your parent or guidance counselor help you with your application. You do not need to be approved for financial aid to apply to a school! A lot of people don't know this, but the due date for your bill is usually like a week to a month before classes start; however, you can be accepted to a school as much as a year in advance! The timeline usually goes like this: Junior year, decide on schools to visit/visit schools. Senior year, apply to schools. Winter of senior year, file FASFA/apply for scholarships (I'll explain what this means in a minute). You are however, going to need $20-$100 for a non-refundable application fee. That's why you must choose your schools so carefully! In addition, most schools want you to write an entrance essay to enclose with your application. I know, I know, the thought of writing an essay sends most people into a panic. Consider asking a trusted English teacher to help you write your essay, and then review it for you. Then show it to two other people. It's a good idea to get multiple opinions, and be prepared to write multiple drafts based on their feedback. If this sounds like a lot of work, welcome to college! 4) Financial aid puts the "F" in "confusion" Ummm...what is a FAFSA? EFC? Do I even need to do this stuff? FAFSA stands for Free Application for Student Aid. It is a one-stop application for federal grants (which you don't have to repay) Direct Loans (which you will have to repay, but don't let this scare you; there are flexible payment plans and you get ten years), and Direct Parent Plus Loans (which your parents repay). It is primarily need based, but if your parents are well-off; don't let this discourage you, most people still qualify for loans. You will need your tax information for the past year, if you worked, as well as your parents' tax info. You will probably need to fill this out with your parents--and you can do it online at fafsa.ed.gov. You should have your three schools chosen and possibly applied to at this point in the process; as you will have to enter the schools you want your information sent to. This is how the financial aid offices of your chosen schools determine your award package. Once complete, print out your confirmation of doing the fafsa so you have proof. You will then receive an SAR or Student Aid Report which is basically the information you put on your fafsa with the addition of your EFC or Expected Family Contribution, or what the school expects you and your family to contribute to the cost of your education. Important! If anything is incorrect, make sure you correct it and send it back. If it is correct, you don't have to do anything--the school will send you an award letter. You decide what money to accept and what to decline. It's important to create a budget for cost of attendance when you decide what school to go to. This includes, but is not limited to: tution/fees, housing, transportation, meals, books, and miscellaneous. That way, you know how much money you are going to have to borrow, and btw, all these expenses are a valid basis for how much to borrow. You do not have to accept all of your aid, but keep in mind that how much you decline will be divided and distributed equally across all semesters of attendance. For example, if you get a loan for $3000 and decide to only take $2000, you will receive $1000 for fall and $1000 for spring. It will be further divided if you attend during the summer. Uneven disbursements are not allowed. This means in the above example you would be unable to take $1500 for fall and $500 for spring. 5) Scholarships start at home. Apply for as many scholarships as you can. Take it from a grad student--people want to give money to kids just starting out, not us old timers. Look at your church, local bank/credit union, and your parents' employers, in addition to your high school. Your counselor should be able to provide you with a list of scholarships; both local as well as national--start applying as soon as you're eligible! Beware, however, of free money for school as advertised online. Most of these offers are scams and not legit. Run anything you come across by your parents or trusted adult. The college you end up choosing will no doubt have numerous scholarships you can apply for as well; and they may even give you some based on the information from your FAFSA! How cool is that? Work study is also an option, wherein a certain portion if not all of your earnings from an on-campus, part-time job go directly into your student account. I did this my first year at a coffee shop--imagine, money for school for sitting on my butt and occasionally making coffee! Make sure you ask about scholarships and work study options when you visit schools! 6) What if I am doing it alone, without my parents' help? This is a tough situation, no matter how you look at it. If your parents are unable or unwilling to help you, you can go through a process to declare yourself an independent student. I recommend this only in extreme cases, as it is usually only approved in situations of abuse or abandonment. My feeling is, if you are 18 and your parents aren't helping you, your financial aid should reflect that. Either way, it's worth a try. Consult a lawyer (some give free consultations) or the financial aid office of your chosen school for help on this. I found information on this at: http://finaid.blackrivertech.edu/PDF%20Documents/Independent%20Student%20Application%20for%202006-2007.pdf 7) No one expects you to figure all this out tomorrow. It is really difficult to understand this stuff! It took me five years and I'm still learning. Most importantly, when you get to school, meet as many people as you can, get involved, study hard, and have fun! Feel free to post a comment with any questions or concerns--I'll answer them to the best of my ability. Until next time!